The sun had tilted a miniature of toward the west by then, but it definitely turned into onerous to convey the intensity of the sunlight hours had lessened. In actual fact, it turned into a radiant, golden afternoon. To refresh myself, I stepped exterior.
Since it wasn’t a ways from dwelling, I sure to head to DC Hill. The no longer-too-excessive hill in the Nandan Kanan home, the save the Deputy Commissioner’s bungalow is found, is referred to as DC Hill Park. In about ten minutes by rickshaw, I reached my hurry back and forth remark.
Within the park, I sat on a brick staircase carved into one aspect of the hill. The originate sky and the light chilly high-tail had been palatable. The feeling of spending a idle afternoon in such an ambiance is onerous to listing. Nearby, there turned into a small stall promoting fuchka and chotpoti. I turned into having chotpoti, after I noticed a neighborhood of of us.
5 or six neatly dressed other folks entered the park—three females, two males, and a miniature miniature one. After looking out around for some time, they selected a unlit corner to take a seat. For about ten minutes, they rested and chatted among themselves.
One of them turned into a younger lady, about 20-25 years passe, carrying a flashy three-piece outfit, with make-up and accessories that made her stand out. She looked more timid than the others, frequently wiping the sweat from her forehead. The others regarded to be announcing something to her, her closely. She listened attentively, nodding enjoy a dutiful lady.
About fifteen to twenty minutes handed in this intention. Meanwhile, they once rapidly glanced around, as if attempting to search out any individual. Quickly, my eyes caught one more neighborhood of six or seven of us, all equally properly-dressed and tidy. It did not take hold of prolonged to know what turned into going on.
The predominant neighborhood turned into the bride’s family, and the newly arrived neighborhood turned into the groom’s family. They greeted every thoroughly different, with the bride and groom bowing to the contact the elders’ feet in a passe ticket of appreciate. After the greetings, the dialogue continued for quite some time.
Sooner or later, each person sat in a circle. Smiles looked on all their faces. They engaged in light-hearted banter, having fun with hot chotpoti and fuchka as they chatted.
By their intention, it turned into sure that the groom’s family had licensed of the bride. The subsequent step would be to space the date. To peek a ability marriage affiliation unfold in this form of design turned into no small joy! The ambiance turned into filled with excitement from every aspect.
I felt the scoot to affix their conversation. I executed up speaking with Khorshed Alam, the groom’s uncle. He turned into accompanied by the groom’s of us and an elder brother. Khorshed ran a small trade and lived reach Chandgaon. He had been attempting to search out a bride for his nephew, Md Saimon, for months. Since they hadn’t realized the excellent match, the technique hadn’t moved ahead.
This turned into the fourth bride he had seen. He talked about that this turned into the first time they had reach exterior to leer a bride.
Low-charge bride viewing
When asked why they took this design, Khorshed talked about, “For the time being, most bride-groom meetings happen in restaurants. We have now carried out it a couple of events too, but it definitely can no longer be carried out in a fee-effective restaurant. Throughout these meetings, there are generally no longer decrease than 15-20 of us brand. Take into yarn it—whilst you happen to utilize no longer decrease than Tk1,500 per person on meals, how grand does that add as much as? Is it in actuality wanted to utilize so grand appropriate to leer a bride?”
Though the advice to meet in the park came from the bride’s aspect, Khorshed beloved the premise and agreed right away. His nephew Saimon works in Kuwait and has returned to Bangladesh with the sole reason of getting married sooner than heading back in a international nation.
Khorshed emphasised the worth component, announcing, “If appropriate the meeting to leer the bride costs Tk40,000–50,000, you would possibly perhaps perchance imagine the costs for the thoroughly different events! Chopping down a miniature in these areas would not anguish. It is beneficial for every aspect.”
I needed to hear the attitude of the bride’s family as properly since they are the ones who generally endure quite a couple of the costs. I spoke to Rokhsana Begum, the bride’s mother. This gracious lady had a thoroughly different outlook.
She explained, “Take into yarn it, who suffers the most when the groom’s family comes to leer the bride? It is a ways the females of the home, is no longer it? By arranging the meeting exterior enjoy this, or no longer it’s a ways a colossal reduction for us. We save no longer must utilize the whole day cooking, or caring about whether we have satisfactory of this dish or that.”
Many of the of us from both families kept mentioning the topic of charge-reducing time and all over again. Many families, along side the bride’s, had been drawn to the premise of meeting at DC Hill or CRB areas on yarn of it turned into practically free. There wasn’t even the bother of shopping a charge to enter these parks. Maybe this is the reason this pattern of arranging bride-viewing meetings in parks turned into changing into more well-liked.
Rokhsana Begum talked about, “Within the past, it turned into popular for the groom’s family to discuss about with six or seven events to leer the bride. At any time when, we had to utilize individually for meals and thoroughly different preparations. It is quite a couple of strain.”
It has change into a standard scene here
Here is the intelligent portion—who would’ve thought that ability brides and grooms would meet over Tk30 chotpoti and Tk40 fuchka in a public park?
For some, or no longer it’s enjoy killing two birds with one stone—in the occasion that they don’t take care of the bride, they’ve no longer decrease than enjoyed an outing.
It is now popular to leer families of ability brides and grooms at DC Hill in Chattogram, accompanied by elders from every aspect. Once the elders homicide talking, they supply the bride and groom some inner most time to discuss as properly.
This scene has change into quite routine, per Munir, a chotpoti seller in the park. “Whenever you reach here in the leisurely afternoon, you would possibly take into yarn any individual or the thoroughly different doing this. No longer decrease than 4–5 meetings enjoy this happen every week.”
A deviation from the passe bride viewing?
Traditionally, the groom’s family visits the bride’s home, or the bride’s family goes to the groom’s home. That’s how or no longer it has been carried out for ages.
This intention is prevalent in nearly every district. However the premise of meeting at parks, strolling around while evaluating the bride or groom, and finalising the marriage date—who would have imagined this form of component? The reply can also very properly be that fully a couple of had regarded as it sooner than.
Once marriages would happen without these meetings of the bride and groom. It turned into all in regards to the family’s decision. Then, the premise grew to alter into well-liked that no matter how well-known the bride is for her elegance, it’s continuously lustrous to leer her sooner than marriage. Elders have it’s prudent to have a peep at the bride in person, and the identical goes for the groom.
This prepare of viewing ability brides and grooms has been prolonged established. Whether or no longer in villages or cities, the prepare remains consistent. And by intention of Chattogram, there appears to be like to be no terminate to the rituals surrounding weddings.
The costs of weddings From the prosperous to the unhappy, there would possibly be one popular belief here: a wedding ought to be good, following all traditions. So that each person in society can boast about how grand turned into spent on the wedding!
Amongst the of us of Chattogram, wedding charges are a point of pride! The more lavish the wedding, the more it will get talked about in the community. However this extravagant intention of doing things continuously leads many to monetary peril.
The bank-breaking charges on weddings
There are endless examples of families who have sold the whole lot to marry off their daughters, leaving them destitute. But, some continue to utilize beyond their intention, fearing societal judgement.
Within the matter of wedding charges, Chittagonians continuously gather themselves in deep water, grand enjoy an ant struggling to terminate afloat. Many fight to increase from the monetary strain.
Thankfully, of us are slowly starting to flee this complex save. Because the events trade and of us change into more trendy, their thinking has superior too. Some are actually breaking a ways flung from these dear traditions, attempting to search out more affordable alternate ideas.
Of us have reach up with contemporary ideas to minimize costs. While some serene strictly adhere to passe customs, many are discovering ways to flee the monetary burden.
They are discovering contemporary ways to minimize loose from the chains of these outdated rituals. The enjoyment of having the potential to retain a ways flung from these rigid traditions can also very properly be seen in conversations with of us enjoy Rokhsana Begum and Khorshed Alam.
“Marriage can also merely serene be about two families coming together. That is the principle scheme of it. However we have allowed these pointless traditions to be bigger than the marriage itself. Everybody can also merely serene settle ways to minimize down wedding costs with none cultural strain,” Khorshed talked about.
This text turned into translated by Miraz Hossain.
